The Most Awesome Thing You'll Ever See

Mang

2009-10-09T11:11:00.000-07:00

hate to be a sissy girl; but look this song is pretty cute, and so is the girl. not too keen on the lisp though.

Art Students and why I don’t like them.

2009-05-30T14:44:00.000-07:00

Ok this is a bad generalization but I’m not fond of some art students, alot of them are alright but I dislike the ones that get all sassy and try to psycho-analyze you. I recently had an encounter with an art student from VU on Friday and, to be honest, it was a pretty exasperating experience. Basically what she said, in a nutshell, was “my boyfriend is more intelligent than you” (referring to my friend Branko and I), “my boyfriend can analyze people very well, he’ll analyze you two and I’m pretty sure that he wouldn’t be impressed” etc… which I found to be very uncouth. Ok it didn’t go EXACTLY like that but you can paint the picture yourself.

She then went on to explain why he’s more intelligent than us. The body of her argument was that he’s had more “life experience” and that he knew shit. Shit like how the ancient Egyptians lived, how the Inca pyramids were constructed; general knowledge crap like that. Well fuck I know shit too, do you want me to explain how a goddamn building stands up? I’m a motherfucking engineer; I design buildings that you live in. Appreciate that you cunter.

I’d like to see you calculate the spacing between steel N12 reinforcement ligs in a concrete beam. Please go ahead; I’d like to see you do that. Yeah that's right you can’t. For about 160 million years dinosaurs were the largest most successful animals on land. See I know useless crap as well; someone give me a PhD. for being able to floccinaucinihilipilificate this piece of information. Yeah go google it.

She was also writing an essay about how the South American coffee bean plantation owners are losing money because big corporations are taking over their business; that's great, super. We should buy shit that's made by small businesses so they can feed their families and I understand that, fucking wonderful.

I can do what you do, I'm learned and shit like that; give me some research material and I’ll write the most awesome essay EVER about fucking coffee bean plantations and their knackered money problems. I’m not an idiot, I can write shit; I can structure essays and provide evidence to support my god damn arguments. Throw some stats in, people love fucking statistics. "56.75% of self owned coffee bean plantations are making 25% less annually in 2008 than they were in 2007", there’s some goddamn stats right there. OK I just made that up but you get the idea. Thesaurus some words to make you sound intelligent and you have an A grade essay, give me a fucking H1.

I’m not making the claim that I’m smarter than anyone or vice versa, I just found it to be a dickhead move for some douche-nozzle to make such a statement; especially since she had just met me on the day. Fuck your philosophical psycho-analyzing motherfucker boyfriend as well. I have friends who do art/sci, comm/arts, eng/arts, arts, and they’re cool; they’re smart and all that. But fuck you if you want to be a cunter about it. Don't be so rude.

A girl drinking coffee, lets hope that she didn't buy it from Nestle or whatever.

T.O.P Really Does Rock My World

2009-05-24T10:02:00.000-07:00

T.O.P’s a madkent, I can’t deny it anymore.

For those of you who don’t know what the FUCK I am on about; Hyori Lee is like the Asian fan boys wet dream. There’s a 90% chance that you would’ve been obsessing over her when you were 15. Anyway the point is T.O.P was born on November 4^th 1987, meaning that he’s around our age; thus placing him in the same category as us for the “Hyori lee obsession” generation.

Now he’s all grown up and macking out with her, props to you son.

Ok so it was a little peck but still AWESOME, I’m nearly 21 and I haven’t made out with Hyori yet, and I don’t think I ever will >: I’D GIVE MY LEFT LUNG TO DO THAT NO LIE.

P.S apparently Hyori was in front of State library filming her MV in 2007, which makes me sad coz I SKIPPED CLASS THAT DAY.

MY Perfect Girl:

2009-05-24T07:25:00.000-07:00

On the topic of perfect girls, I’ve always mentioned little bits and pieces of the type of girl I’d want in my previous posts but never something definitive. I think I’ll list my criterion now, but it’s probably going to change when I get older.

Height wise I’d like her to be around 175, although any other number is fine but the optimum is 175. Why? Because with heels on she’ll be close to 185 (which is my height); that means she’ll be eye to eye with me which is pretty awesome. I won’t have to bend over to hear her talk or whatever, it just works out. Also my kids will be tall because tall + tall = tall or taller, I do engineering/science and majoring in math so don’t try to argue with my calculations here. 175+ heels will give her an elegant/pretty look for an Asian girl which really does it for me.

When it comes to personality I’d prefer a good girl; I’ve stated previously that personality is the body to a girlfriend cake. Loud rowdy girls make me cringe, quiet and well mannered girls make me smile; being sensible and having proper manners will go a long way. There’s a number of reasons behind this but the main two are: If I introduce her to my parents, if she’s raucous, they’d hit the roof; that goes double for my dad, so if I want them to get along well then she needs those attributes. Number two would be that I’m not keen on having a problematic girlfriend; I know every relationship will have problems but if they’re dealt with in the wrong way then it’s not going to last long. Things like whether we can sustain a conversation, if she spouts nonsense out of her mouth or not, and what her future prospects are will play a big role. Also no sluts allowed.

Face wise I’m not fuss, aslong as she doesn’t look like a foot I don’t care; but preferably big eyes, double eyelids, broad nose bridge, pointy nose, nice jawline, and fairly pale. If she smiles (and I mean naturally, none of this fake smile bullshit) and it makes me smile then that’s a good sign, a good smile also goes a long way.

Dress sense, hair, and makeup aren’t needed. These things can be taught LOL.

This girl's my type (especially when she smiles), BANG!

The Perfect Girl:

2009-05-18T12:36:00.000-07:00

Everyone here thinks about the future, and generally this future will consist of you and your significant other. A lot of us obsess about who we’re going to end up with in 10~20 years time; and by obsessing we end up creating an image of the “ideal” girl (or man for the gays and girls out there). I won’t be economical with the truth (lie) here, I am an active daydreamer who does fantasize about the perfect female companion (approximately 175 cm tall, asian, pointy nose with a broad bridge, big eyes, double eyelids, pale, nice smile, slim, nice hair, and nice fashion sense; if you fit this criteria please contact me IMEDIATELY), and by doing this I’ve built up an impossible standard that no girl can ever meet. I’m very sure that a lot of people have done this as well.

I will now go through a number of factors that play key roles in the choosing a female companion.

The chase:

I think that the chase is one of the major contributors to the “fondness” factor. If you think about it; people aren’t satisfied if they get what they want when they want it. I’m pretty sure that everyone can relate to this following example. When you were a child and you wanted a toy, wasn’t it much more gratifying on reception if you had to wait, than the ones that you had received immediately? This is because you build up the tension in your head and the thrill of recieving said gift excites you; it’ll the most awesome thing ever and you’ll cherish it (FYI I still have my white ranger and tiger zord; some cunter stole my green ranger and dragon zord though; you fucking motherfucker).

I know I am objectifying women again (comparing them to power ranger figurines) but you're going to appreciate that girl alot more because of the chase. The more you want you want her, the more satisfying it will be when she says yes if you ask her out. A WARNING THOUGH: There is a very fucking fine line between being keen and being a stalker, don’t fall into the latter category.

Looks:

When it comes to looks I honestly I don’t think that such a thing as the “universal” perfect girl exists. This is because every person has his/her own perception of beauty. For instance; I fucking love tall girls but I know a lot of other people don’t; although I don’t know why (and to be honest I think you’re weird) but that’s the thing. Each person has their own inimitable preferences. Some people like tanned girls, some like pale girls; some like big eyes, some like small eyes, and some like no eyes (that’s a bizarre fetish but I won’t judge you). The point is you’ll have different tastes depending on how and where you’re brought up, meaning that a universal “perfect girl” doesn’t exist. Everyone has flaws and that’s natural; no one can be perfect. Who gives a shit if your friend doesn't think that she's mad, if you do then that's all that matters. So don’t hate on other peoples girlfriends because they’re not “your type”, they might be their type and that's what makes them happy.

Looks is also most likely the main reason that you’ll even talk to the girl in the first place, if she isn’t hot then you won’t even turn your head; no lie. But I'll also have to note that looks isn't everything in a relationship; if she's hot then that's good, but that's only the "icing” on the cake.

Personality:

It counts; as much as I do want a girl who looks like kim ha yul. She’s not worth SHIT if she’s a fucking whore (In my opinion good girls are the best, I love them). I grade this very highly because at the end of the day you’ll be living with this person, and if you don’t like her when you’re dating her then imagine in 20 years time when you two share a house and kids together. You’ll want to kill yourself because she’s a massive cunter, I know I will. I've said previously that looks is the icing, well then this is the “body” of the cake.

In my opinion; to find a girlfriend you’ll have to make exceptions, I know for a fact that I’ll probably never find a girl that meets the criteria that I had stated previously (especially one who’ll be keen on me or have a good personality and be fucking single). But I will find some very nice girls who aren’t 175 or don’t have gigantic eyes, or whatever else I mentioned; as long as she’s “all that in a packet of chips” to me then that’s all that matters. If you do find a girl that you're keen on act soon because you don’t want to have some cock-face pick her up at a club and knock her up, that’s game over dude; you’ll want to stab him (and yourself soon after because you didn’t act in time), no lie. Don’t be a stubborn cockhead, you’ll end up alone for the rest of your life; but don’t settle for just anything either because you won’t be happy. Be selective and choose a good cake (not a safeway one).

I LOVE MICKEY MOUSE.

Special thanks for Cindy for nagging me all the time lol.

I don't know if i was clear enough because I was abit tired when I was writing; but what i was trying to say was that you should be picky but you should also have realistic expectations.

Scrubs SERIES Finale/FTTS disbanding

2009-05-11T12:57:00.000-07:00

I loved it, a fantastic way to end a fantastic series. Watch it if you haven't already.

Tbh I'm pretty sad that it's over, but i knew it was coming (especially since it was announced that season 7 was going to be their last season but that got dicked because of the writers strike). It was a good ending that made me reflect on alot of things in my life.

I was also, unfortunately,shattered to find out that Fly To The Sky are going to be doing solo projects and that their last official album was album 8. Apparently they're going to be making digital singles together in the future but lets not try to sugar coat it, they've pretty much separated and I seriously wasn't expecting that.

With the arrival of the end of one of my favorite series and one of my favorite musical groups; I'm going to have to say that I have taken something away from this. I should appreciate the things that I have now before it's too late. I've always waited for the latest Scrubs episode to come out or the newest FTTS album to be released but now...it's not going to happen anymore. Things like friends for instance, thanks for being there guys etc... :)

Relationships:

2009-04-25T16:04:00.001-07:00

This is my theory on how relationships between a boy and a girl will bloom. It doesn’t customarily work like this but generally, the skeletal frame will be similar. This is from the male perspective because…well…I have a penis so I can’t really write form the females perspective.

When you meet someone there will usually be some kind of chemistry. Be it looks or personality there will always be an initial spark that sets it off between the two people. It isn’t typically the latter; but if you get to know the person well then it may be. Commonly if you find that the initial meeting went well then you may move onto the next round. I’d advise to not jump the gun and move there right away because you’ll look keen as; a few more meetings down the track would be a safer bet.

Once you pass that stage you may then advance to the texting/phone call/msn stage (any kind of communication really); in my opinion this stage can make or break you. This is where you lay the foundation for the future, and (if you play your cards right) here you can look like the most awesome cunt ever to this lass. Don’t flood her phone with messages and missed calls because you’ll look like el creepo, and we don’t want that. Only a certain level of keenness should be taken; too much and you’ll freak the girl out, too little and you get nowhere.

If things go well there then the next stage would be to organize a meeting, this may be either in a group or solo. Talk to her and get to know her better (and also so she can get to know you better). I’m pretty sure that if it advances to this stage then she’ll suspect that you’re keen on her; although I’ve noticed that when it reaches this stage, a majority of my female friends are habitually oblivious to this fact. I don’t know why but maybe it’s the whole “it’s happening to me so I’m going to be ignorant” syndrome; generally from the outside looking in, you can usually tell that the dude is “le eager” (that’s French for keen). Fiona, however, is not an example of the “IGNORANT syndrome” because she thinks every dude is keen on her (LOL).

There are a lot of factors to consider but in theory if things go well… then bang, you’re in; if not then you’re gone. The game’s over and you should give up; don’t continue to beat a dead horse, its dead leave the poor animal alone!

Usually when a prospect presents itself you must make a choice. You have to decide to whether or not you will advance to the next level or stop here. This decision must be made as soon as possible because if you doddle for too long and procrastinate (because of whatever reasons you have for dragging your feet) then you will lose that opportunity; and losing that opening is one of the shittest feelings ever. There is nothing worse than meeting that girl again and thinking, “me and her could’ve been something”. Don’t try to revive the spark again because well… dead horse. I’ve had some dead horses in my life; I’m a very regretful person.

HOT GIRLS MAKING HEART SHAPES

2009-04-18T14:03:00.000-07:00

i love this shit

T.O.P rocks

2009-04-18T10:22:00.000-07:00

You're so cool T.O.P

2009-03-24T10:39:00.000-07:00

I found the HD version of Gee. Haha i'm awesome.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DU4l3p0AGu8

Admiral Ackbar: "IT'S A TRAP!"

2009-03-18T04:32:00.000-07:00

IT'S A GODDAMN TRAP MOTHER FUCKERS, GTFO!

Games We Play When We're Bored

2009-03-15T09:41:00.000-07:00

The “my wife, my gf, I’d do her or leave her alone” game.

So this game was first played by me in November of 2007 with my friend Kanishka. We’d sit at mc clock (but anywhere with a high female count is good) and check out the girls that walk past. When you see a girl who’s attractive you must then shotgun her before your mate(s) do/does.I am objectifying women and apologize...again.

There would usually be 4 options available when shot gunning:

1) “I’d do her”, this option is viable when you see a hot girl that u would like to have relations with. This is usually the pick when the girl is hot but clearly too skanky to introduce to your parents. Typically since A. she’s probably taken many dicks and B. she just looks slutty MAX.

Note: if she looks like she’s a coke addict who would probably steal your money after intercourse; be prepared to hide your cash in your sock.

2) “My gf”, if you do see a mad girl who you would like to peruse a relationship with, (which may lead to marriage because she’s hot and looks clean) then you may shotgun her as your girl friend. Your friend is now barred from shot gunning unless you provide the option for a devil’s three-way (2 dudes 1 chick); therefore a double shotgun may take place if the friend is willing.

3) “My wife”, if you spot a chick who’s a 10/10 in your books, and I’m talking about Hyori Lee/ Park Eun Kyung/Lee Ji Woo 10, you may then shotgun her. This is usually done because the girl is just too mad and u can’t let her wander around in the wild because she would probably get nailed by a douche bag.

4) “Leave her alone”, is if the female is aesthetically unpleasing. In this situation you may choose to be a massive dog and tag her as “your (your friends) girlfriend”. However If your friend is witty enough to construct a comeback within 10 seconds, you must then take her as your own female companion. This rule is implemented because you have decided to be a massive wanker and attempted to dog your friend. However your friend has then outplayed you, therefore a penalty will be executed.

Note: comeback has to actually be good, if the comeback is lame and an argument erupts; a paper, scissors, rock competition will be held to decide the winner, best two out of three. Usually if the comeback is good the person who initiated in the dogging will know, accept and graciously step down. There will be no need for a paper, scissors, rock bout.

However if the comeback is so lame that you shouldn't have opened your mouth in the first place; you will be double dogged. Therefore every non aesthetically pleasing female who walks past will be crowned as your girlfriend and will last for the entirety of the day. So think carefully before you decide to gamble on the comeback, or even initiate in dogging.

This game was played extensively during my first year of uni, unfortunately not second year as Kanishka has now left to partake in commando training. I miss you buddy!

Examples:

I'd do her (this girl does porno and therefore does not fit the criteria for a gf/wife candidate)

My gf (eyy!)

My wife (EYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!cos111!!11!)

9 Korean girls in tight jeans and heels, GEE GEE!

2009-03-09T00:37:00.000-07:00

You douche bags have to watch the HQ version.
I'd do the one at 0:44 with the pink jeans and sunnies.
the one in red jeans at 1:03 who also does that nervous finger shit at 1:05.
Also the one at 1:22 green jacket blue jeans.

I'd do the others as well, except for like 2 or 3 of them, but those were the only 3 that stood out. Also the one called Tiffany who looks hot but I can’t find her there coz the rest pretty much all look alike. They don’t look so good in some pictures though :(

edit:

OK so i found out their names, I'm so friggin awesome.

Pause it at 2:30 when they're in a V

LEFT TO RIGHT:
Hyoyeon - red pants, pony tale
Sunny - dark pants, hoodie, bangs
Jessica - bob, blue pants
Taeyeon - dark pants, short hair
Jessica - dark blue pants, short wavy hair
Seohyun - pink pants
Yuri - blue pants, green hoodie
Sooyoung - Yellow pants
Yoona - red pants, sparkly shirt

Robocop definition

2009-03-04T04:39:00.000-08:00

So while I was playing [unnamed game because I'm actually ashamed of playing it] with Julian and co. a few weeks ago; we ended up smashing some wankers extremely hard and Julian screamed (he typed in capitals which is the equivalent to screaming) “YEAH GO FUCKING ROBOCOP THEM”. Therefore a new use for the word Robocop was born.

Robocop:

{Verb}

To own and/or rape someone hard.

To completely obliterate and win without competition.

"I so Robocoped that douchebag last night."

"We’re going to Robocop these tools!"

Soccer girls

2009-03-02T19:40:00.001-08:00

well what can i say?

The legendary mug cake

2009-03-02T18:36:00.000-08:00

Long have men sought after the illusive god cake. Legends say that the cakes preparations are simple, take little time (5 minutes in fact) and it tastes better than their store brought counterparts. Regrettably such a cake doesn’t exist in our world; as me and 4 of my friends (Tim, Andy, Chii Shi and Peter) comprehended the hard way. This is going to be a heartbreaking tale of loss and defeat which is easily on par with any of Shakespeare’s tragic plays.

Our spirits were high as we set out on our adventure to create the “mug (god) cake”. We were so keen that we got into the car to buy the ingredients and realized that no one had made a shopping list. This didn’t faze us though as our spirits were high and we had promised our stomachs epic cake satisfaction.

However once we had obtained the ingredients we then had the arduous task of making the cake mix. Usually this would be quite a simple undertaking; except for the fact that we now had to mix it in a mug which made it that much more difficult. Soon after completing our cake mix we became quite disheveled. The realizations that our efforts were going to be in vain were slowly sinking in.

After microwaving and testing about 8 mug cakes we concluded that the effort and time (also the cleaning up) required to construct such a bake good was not worth the level of awesomeness that was derived. Consequently the option of buying a cake from Safeway will be a much more viable alternative in the future.

We then proceeded to play “Naruto: Ultimate Ninja Storm” on the ps3 as we ate a most unsatisfying cake that was soaked in the broken dreams and tears of young men. We also got smashed by Chii Shi in Naruto.

Moreover, Tim managed to polish off about half a tub of mint ice-cream, an impressive feat that deserves some form of accolade. That boy sure was keen for his ice-cream.

Apologies

2009-03-02T18:34:00.000-08:00

I’m going to have to apologize to Mr Blog here; regrettably I have been neglecting him (like a dead beat father would his child); However I would like to make it up to him now as i will attempt to make a string of posts.

More Cars =D

2009-01-30T16:06:00.001-08:00

Thankyou Mr A. Yu, otherwise know as Andy Y (i'm trying to be obscure but evidently failing).

Aston Martin Vantage

Lamborghini Murcielago

Loving Power Rangers

2009-01-29T15:04:00.000-08:00

Most of you who know me know that I am a power ranger fanatic; they rock my jocks and, to a lesser extent, my socks.

But why do I love power rangers so much? Because as a kid they were the most awesome shit ever; it was my dream to be a ranger… and it still is.

Green was the best! don’t mess with the Green ranger because he’ll FUCK YOU UP.

Fuck this week's going to be so gay.

HOT

2009-01-29T13:28:00.000-08:00

Well it’s fucking hot and, quoting Fiona, “I need ice cream down my pants”. It’s so hot that it’s killed my friggin phone AND net; that’s a double whammy people. So I'm just going to post this later when my net isn't fucking up.

Ps. wishing Ed the best of luck in Japan! I would’ve said it in Japanese but I don’t know how to because, quoting peter this time, I’m a “shit cunt linguist".

Girls and Cars

2009-01-25T09:56:00.000-08:00

Before we start I’m going to have to apologize in advance to the female readers because I AM GOING TO OBJECTIFY YOU. Please don't be mad lol.

I think a majority of us have made this connection before; that girls are a lot like cars. I used to do this very often with Gab Chung-ers back in high school and, more recently, with Chris Choongas. Our very in-depth conversations outline what type of cars/girls we’d want and also pair girls, who we already know, with automobiles that we think exemplify them.

First of all we need to know how you’d go about categorizing girls as cars; there are many factors that go into it. Take note that this is my own criterion and can be changed if you don’t agree.

Looks: Hot car = hot girl plain and simple.

Miles per gallon (Fuel): No one wants a girl that sucks all your money; but if you can afford it then go for it.

Alarm systems/Reliability: Girls that break down too often are no good. Crap alarm system = easy girls. Having scanty reliability and alarms means that you have an extremely crap-core car. I don’t care how aesthetically pleasing she is; either get her serviced or get a new one coz they’re not worth your time.

Boot space/saloons: This would be for family potential. Think of the practicality of a 2 door sports compared to a 4 door saloon; no space for the kids, groceries, dog, cat, whatever else u need to put in there. Deep down we all want a 4 door saloon with plenty of boot space. Mr. Choongas also suggested that boot space is directly proportional to a lady’s mammary gland size, which can range from Tarago-esque volume to cappuccino/mini-cooper.

Speed: Can be used to determine how exciting a girl is, no one wants a boring girl.

There are a lot of cars out there with similar specs/prices so what do you do? You can match any part of the names of the car with the initial letter of the girl’s name. For example Integra DC5 type-R for Rosie (the R can be for Rosie), type-S for Susie, Skyline V-spec 2 for Vivien, Lamborghini Murcielago for Michelle and so on.

Take note: stay away from the unreliable whore cars that suck your money, time and life. They’ll then get taken out for joy rides by other guys because of their faulty alarm system. Sometimes u can’t find a car with a name that coincides with their initial letter because most of the vehicles you can think of would be too good. So you have to go with a Crappy Daewoo model, or a GM Minivan by default. http://www.motorauthority.com/the-10-worst-cars-today.html

Personally I’d like a BMW M3 saloon; looks, speed, family potential and reliable (it’s fucking German dude). Not too bad at all :)

I feel that these pictures are very relevant to the topic and have decided to post them up aswell.

Problem

2009-01-18T14:02:00.000-08:00

The Mercedes, V-spec 2 or Porsche?

ps. this is what i wanted to do after watching supernatural. Unfortunately i couldn't find a horse to punch; good thing is I'm alive and i don't have horse shoe imprints in my chest.

Supernatural

2009-01-16T12:00:00.000-08:00

It’s 5:51 am in the morning and I just finished watching the latest ep of supernatural. It’s been abit over 1 month since the hiatus started and I was expecting this ep to be one of those mediocre, run of the mill, monster of the week ones... and guess what? I was HALF right; it was, sort of, a monster of the week ep...

BUT IT ALSO FUCKING ROCKED, IT WAS FAR FROM ORDINARY. I was planning to sleep after watching it... BUT I CANT; I’M TOO EXCITED TO SLEEP BECAUSE IT WAS SO FUCKING GOOD. THIS CAN BE EXEMPLIFIED THROUGH MY EXCESSIVE USE OF FUCKING CAPS LOCK. IT WAS THAT GOOD! FUCK DUDE I FEEL SO PUMPED. I’M GOING TO GO OUT AND PUNCH A FUCKING BEAR/HORSE/COW/OX IN THE GOD DAMN NECK (I'D PROBABLY DIE DOING IT) BUT THAT’S HOW PUMPED I AM! DEAN, MR CHISELED CHEST, WINCHESTER IS THE MAN-LIEST SHIT EVER.

Please enjoy this very masculine portrait of Dean. Look at those eyes, they cut right into your soul!