Girls and Cars

Before we start I’m going to have to apologize in advance to the female readers because I AM GOING TO OBJECTIFY YOU. Please don't be mad lol.

I think a majority of us have made this connection before; that girls are a lot like cars. I used to do this very often with Gab Chung-ers back in high school and, more recently, with Chris Choongas. Our very in-depth conversations outline what type of cars/girls we’d want and also pair girls, who we already know, with automobiles that we think exemplify them.

First of all we need to know how you’d go about categorizing girls as cars; there are many factors that go into it. Take note that this is my own criterion and can be changed if you don’t agree.

Looks: Hot car = hot girl plain and simple.

Miles per gallon (Fuel): No one wants a girl that sucks all your money; but if you can afford it then go for it.

Alarm systems/Reliability: Girls that break down too often are no good. Crap alarm system = easy girls. Having scanty reliability and alarms means that you have an extremely crap-core car. I don’t care how aesthetically pleasing she is; either get her serviced or get a new one coz they’re not worth your time.

Boot space/saloons: This would be for family potential. Think of the practicality of a 2 door sports compared to a 4 door saloon; no space for the kids, groceries, dog, cat, whatever else u need to put in there. Deep down we all want a 4 door saloon with plenty of boot space. Mr. Choongas also suggested that boot space is directly proportional to a lady’s mammary gland size, which can range from Tarago-esque volume to cappuccino/mini-cooper.

Speed: Can be used to determine how exciting a girl is, no one wants a boring girl.

There are a lot of cars out there with similar specs/prices so what do you do? You can match any part of the names of the car with the initial letter of the girl’s name. For example Integra DC5 type-R for Rosie (the R can be for Rosie), type-S for Susie, Skyline V-spec 2 for Vivien, Lamborghini Murcielago for Michelle and so on.

Take note: stay away from the unreliable whore cars that suck your money, time and life. They’ll then get taken out for joy rides by other guys because of their faulty alarm system. Sometimes u can’t find a car with a name that coincides with their initial letter because most of the vehicles you can think of would be too good. So you have to go with a Crappy Daewoo model, or a GM Minivan by default. http://www.motorauthority.com/the-10-worst-cars-today.html

Personally I’d like a BMW M3 saloon; looks, speed, family potential and reliable (it’s fucking German dude). Not too bad at all :)

I feel that these pictures are very relevant to the topic and have decided to post them up aswell.